Children with Disabilities
Tala Termah
Governors State University
SPED2100
Russell
April 29, 2020
Title: Ten Things Every Child Living With Autism Wishes You Knew
Author: Ellen Notbohm
Publisher: Future Horizons
Date of publication: 2005
Summary of the plot
Once your child is diagnosed with autism, it’s natural to get wracked with fear as to what kind of life they will ultimately live, and knowing their condition will go a long way to alleviating that fear. If you don’t have an autistic kid, you’ll probably meet one during your own life. Be it through school for your children of friends, relatives, neighbours, or other scenarios; there’s a good likelihood you or your kids will communicate with someone who has autism. Author Ellen Notbohm is the mother of an autistic child and a highly acclaimed writer of dozens of books on this and many other topics of mental health.
The idea in her book “Ten Things Every Child With Autism Wishes You Knew” is brought out through various chapters and Illustrates the disorder’s complexities and provides tips on how to cope with those children. In the first chapter, the author tells the reader to understand that the disabled are first and foremost, a child who has autism. A parent must not perceive the child as autistic but rather an aspect of their total character. The book needs everyone to understand that autism does not define an individual as a person. It is critical to acknowledge that as an adult, one can easily identify themselves and have some say as an adult over how you define yourself. An adult can make it clear if they want to isolate a single feature. This is never the case for a child who is still developing. Therefore, no one knows what a child is capable of doing, and defining them by one attribute runs the risk of generating an expectation that may be too small.
The next chapter requires an understanding that the sensory perception of a child with autism is disordered. The most challenging aspect of autism to comprehend could be sensory integration, but it is arguably the most important. It implies that daily ordinary sights, smells, sounds, touches, and tastes that you might not even recognize may be a child’s pain. The same setting, they always have to stay in seems intimidating. They might seem to you withdrawn or beleaguered but they may only try to protect themselves. That is why even an “easy” shopping trip could be so difficult to them.
The authors further explain in chapter three that for them, sensitive and articulate language and vocabulary may be huge obstacles. I am not listening to directions. It is because they cannot understand anyone. That is what I hear when you call me from across the room. Therefore, it is required that they get addressed directly in plain words. This will make them get what they are expected of; it would be much easier to comply.
Children living with this disorder should be perceived as a concrete thinker, which means that they interpret language very literally. This means that use of tough words such as idioms, metaphors, allusions, sarcasm, inference, puns, and any other technical terms can never be interpreted by children suffering from this kind of disorder. For instance, do not tell them, “hold your horse, cowboy!” while what you mean is, “please stop running.” This will never interpret such terms leading to misunderstanding.
Fast forward, the authors broadly speak in chapter five about entertaining the simple fact that these children have a minimal vocabulary with them. For this reason, it is always a challenge to deduce what they could be requesting. Due to this inability to communicate would eventually lead to frustrations and even confusion among these children. Moreover, it could be a problem for them to express while hungry. It, therefore, requires anyone who interacts with them to be alert of their body language, agitations, and any other signs most times to help them get whatever they may be trying to pass across.
On the contrary, there is an opposite side of the coin to this: they could behave like a “little professor” or movie star, bouncing off terms or entire scripts far beyond their level of maturity. These are mastered phrases from the environment surrounding them to cover for the language deficits, so they know that when spoken to, they supposed to react. Such terms can originate from books, television, other people’s speeches. The meaning or language they use is not generally understood to them. They know it’s just getting them off the hook to come up with a response.
Chapter six, the book explains the reason why it is critical to show these kinds of children how to do something rather than just telling them by word of mouth. It is vital to learn that these children are more visually oriented since language is very difficult for them. A visual planner is of utmost benefit as they pass during the day. Like every other person’s daytime, it alleviates them of the burden of wondering what is next, encourages a seamless transition between tasks, allows them to control their time and satisfy their goals.
As the author moves to chapter seven of the book, she stresses focusing on what disabled children can do rather than what they cannot do. Like any other person, they can’t thrive in a setting where they are consistently made to believe like they are not valuable enough, and like they require “fixing.” Doing something different when they are almost guaranteed to be confronted with criticism, albeit “constructive,” becomes something to be avoided. Search for their qualities and probably could find them. There is more than one “right” way of doing most of the stuff.
Towards the end of the book in chapter eight, the author urges the readers to assist the affected children with social interactions. It might appear like they are not interested in playing on the playground with the rest of the kids, but in most cases, it is just that they really don’t understand how to engage in conversation or enter a play scenario. Whether you can persuade other kids to invite those kids to join them in dodge ball or playing basketball, they would be excited to be included. They perform well in organized play events that have a simple start and end. Likewise, they don’t know how to interpret facial gestures, body posture, or other people’s feelings. Thus, they need to receive extra social interaction coaching.
The next chapter addresses identifying various causes of meltdown among children with autism. Outbursts, kick-ups, meltdowns, however, you want to name them, are much more disturbing to these kids than they are to “ordinary” people. They happen when one or more of their senses are overwhelmed. These can be avoided if one can find out why they have outbursts. Keep record times, settings, individuals, activities in a file. A trend may pop up. Try to note that all attitudes are communication means. It shows how they understand something which is occurring within their surroundings while their phrases cannot.
Lastly, in the last chapter of the book, the author’s plea to everyone is to express unconditional love to every child living with this disorder. This is because living with autism was never their option. Their chances of healthy, self-reliant adulthood are slim without the much-needed support from anyone they communicate with. But with the right guidance and help, the chances are larger than you would think. In addition, she urges us to have empathy with these children and work towards viewing their autism as a hidden ability instead of a disorder. It is best to look beyond what may be considered shortcomings and see the gifts that autism has brought them.
Although the book was first released in 2005, its insights remain highly important (note-the book’s revised version was released in 2012). Its chapters discuss different aspects of autism spectrum disorder and offer essential tips and guidance to help your child respond to them (Notbohm, 2005). Drawn up with zeal and sensitivity to the problem, the overall purpose of this book is to educate autistic children’s parents to teach their children how to operate in everyday life. Throughout the life of the child, the skills that parents will pass to them through their interactions will be relevant even after they have transitioned into adult life. This book assists parents in understanding how the brain, thought patterns, and the ability of their children to perceive the world vary from their own. It is also difficult to raise an autistic child since parents equate the actions of their child to that of an individual who does not possess the condition. Talking at their child on their vision and perceptions will make it challenging to recognize why they’re behaving the way they’re doing, even if it’s having a random tantrum or not interacting with other kids in school.
The book suggestions are perfect for children at the low to middle end of the scale, but they do not tackle concerns of children with more serious autistic disorder. Notbohm’s own child with autism interacts verbally and is capable of doing “usual” things such as going to dances and sleep camp. The tips in this book may still be useful for a parent whose own child’s autism is more serious, but may need to look further into seeking services that resolve their particular set of issues. The key message in this book is that autistic children are the same as anyone else, in that they don’t expect their disability to dictate them. Unlike a paraplegic child’s parent or a child with a particular mental illness, parents of autism children must not treat them as “disabled.” Like children who are physically disabled, updated, and tailored learning resources should be given to children with mental disabilities that will assist them in overcoming the world surrounding them effectively.
In addition, the book takes several steps to clarify how parents can treat their children and offers a lot of knowledge to enable parents to recognize them. It is also an easy to read book, and it moves quickly so that a parent or teacher can read it within a relatively short period of time. Besides, it is also a helpful tool for fast guidance in those situations where a parent is uncertain on how to handle a particular behaviour, such as echolia, that is related to this condition.
Overall, the author has provided extremely informative and incredibly helpful ideas to parents and friends alike, so it’s certainly worth reading whether you’re the parent of an autistic child or if you interact with an autistic child.
Identifying the parents as playing a vital role in their child’s successful care has a significant benefit for the child. However, it’s a position that isn’t cost-free, and the family life implications are considerable. According to Hoefman, Payakachat, van Exel, Kuhlthau, Kovacs, Pyne & Tilford, (2014), many parents of autistic children encounter many challenging tasks. These entail teaching and advocating while being a caring parent and still a member of the family. Therefore, affected parents are subjected to various challenging demands in providing support, especially in decision-making and control, while providing adequate professional expertise to facilitate their choices.
Although most families are capable of dealing well with this problem, other families will encounter significant difficulty in educating a child with autism. According to the National Research Council. (2001), moms usually show more depression than fathers, frequently discussing time-related problems and selfless sacrifice. Among the particular concerns raised by mothers are worries about the health of their child in the years ahead, the capacity of the child to operate independently and the acceptance of their child by the community. Additionally, mothers of children with autism face more discomfort compared to mothers with children with other disabilities. On the other hand, affected fathers show more interruption of family planning activities and a greater demand for household finances than fathers whose children normally grow
The time spent dealing with an autistic child is often frustrating and challenging, but it does have the ability to lower family suffering and boost the standard of living for the whole family along with the autistic child. Approaches like individualized problem solving, in-house assessments, and preparation and philosophical sessions with families have been used. Mums who develop skills based on their child’s TEACCH education model display a reduction in symptoms of depression over time compared to those that never undergo such training. Educating parents about using critical response preparation as a component of their integrated behavioural analysis guidance lead to better parent-child relationships, greater parent involvement in engagement, less tension, and a much more productive form of interaction. Using successful teaching strategies may have a tangible positive effect on family depression for a child with autism.
In conclusion, having a child with an autistic spectrum disorder is a challenge for any family. It is therefore advisable that parents learn and successfully apply skills required in changing the behaviour of their children with such disorders. Any other individual that interact with these affected children should perceive them as normal human beings who are not autistic but rather should view their condition as an aspect of their total character. Most importantly, they require unconditional love. This will enable them interact with ease with everyone within their environment.
References
Hoefman, R., Payakachat, N., van Exel, J., Kuhlthau, K., Kovacs, E., Pyne, J., & Tilford, J. M. (2014). Caring for a child with autism spectrum disorder and parents’ quality of life: application of the CarerQol. Journal of autism and developmental disorders, 44(8), 1933-1945.
National Research Council. (2001). Educating children with autism. National Academies Press.
Notbohm, E. (2005). Ten things every child with autism wishes you knew. Future Horizons.