Happy marriages and relationships
‘The science of good marriage’ by Dr. Gottman’s talks of deep friendship being the primary basis of happy marriages and relationships. This means having respect for one another and getting to know their likes and dislikes clearly. Dr. Gottman’s also adds that couples who are close friends have an advantage when it comes to solving conflicts. Since they have an exquisite knowledge of each other and even mutual respect, thus resolving disputes will be an easy task for them. In my previous relationships, there were lots of differences between us, which resulted in many conflicts. Solving the conflicts was not an easy task for either of us. The main reason being there was no mutual respect. We never got to consider that getting to know each other’s likes and dislikes would help us solve conflicts better.
Dr.Fowler considers friendship as an essential virtue in marriage. Based on the experiences from my past relationship, friendship, and also mutual respect will be my key consideration in the next relationship. Gottman further points out that partners who know each other well are more likely to understand how they will sort out their issues in tricky situations. This is because they know each other’s likes and dislikes. Thus before getting into any other relationship, I will get to know his likes and dislikes and understand instances where I get to cross his boundaries. Gottman reveals that close friendship contributes to a long-lasting marriage.
Lastly, when it comes to a romantic partnership, my strengths get portrayed in active-listening, self-restraint, and also generosity. When it comes to solving problems or even sharing our moments, I am keen on listening to my partner since I get to understand all about his life desires and also experiences. Generosity also comes in handy in relationships as I actively contribute to sharing my ideas and material possession. Self-restraint gets portrayed during times of conflict where I get to understand the other party more than myself, thus not considering myself. When it comes to a romantic relationship, judgment is the communication skill that needs some improvement. Most of my conclusions are based on poor judgment, mainly because I do not consider the other partner’s likes and dislikes, which results in lots of conflicts. Active-listening and right judgment are the most crucial communication skills in marital communication as they help marital partners understand each other.