Parenting skills and how they affect children’s growth both in physical development and physical activities
Children are prone to be the mirror image of the parenting that sustained them in their early development years. A truant child presumably reflects neglect in proper moral ideals given while a child who is the model in behavior incites proper guidance from parents. However, it is not always the case to every child as differences occur according to the area, family ideals and culture practiced. This paper aims to focus on parenting skills and how they affect children’s growth both in physical development and physical activities. By creating a contrast between the advantages and disadvantages of some parenting measures, I aim to foster a deeper understanding as to how parenting plays a major role in shaping a child’s destiny.
Parents in a bid to raise responsible kids, tend to raise the “ideal” child they want not the child they have, limiting a child’s growth mentally. Such occurrences are especially for hypercompetitive parents with advantaged backgrounds aspiring to create the model child. It is not, however, limited to privileged parents as research indicates assertive parents tend to push for their failed dreams and shortcomings onto their children in a bid to seek redemption for themselves (Oster, 2019). In raising the child they want, parents lose focus on the behavior and shortcomings of the child they have. The child feels neglected and at times children may want to lie up to high expectations they cannot possibly achieve. Personal desires of the child would be overlooked as parents tend to have all the activities the child should participate in mapped out, according to their wishes. This kind of environment fosters feelings of resentment within a child and frustrates them internally. Parents should instead focus on the mechanisms that work for their child specifically and not controlling every detail of a child’s life. Children raised in this manner, tend to become patsy’s of their parents, lacking a general say over their happiness. Generally, they become unhappy and frustrated over their lives. Most would be inclined to ask approval first from parents before making any decisions, even after they are well old enough to be able to make decisions on their own.
A research was conducted on the Teach Your Baby to Read, that argued babies could be trained from as early as 3 months, by using extensive video footage to teach the children. In matters of health, babies as young as that should not be exposed to high degrees of screen time and babies do not in basic terms relate well with video learning. Results indicated that the method showed no substantial results to babies aged 9 to 18 months (Oyster, 2019). Parents who exposed their kids during this age in a bid to make their kids learn earlier risked exposing them to unhealthy circumstances. Parents should instead focus on learning and understanding their children. Knowing the likes and dislikes and governing their parenting around the child, as the focus, not using their unfulfilled desires to control what or who the child should become. This disconnect in child-raising differs from parental debates on societal implications and the family needs. People living in poor backgrounds are more prone to push their children to perform better and secure a good working position or work to provide for the family rather than focus on his/her studies. Individuals in rich backgrounds would be focused on raising their kids to take over the family business or being a model career instead of letting them pursue their dreams. With society creating unrealistic expectations from children, the pressure gets on to the parents who want to ensure the child does not “disappoint” (Oyster, 2019). Parents should instead create a pre-determined focus on the child. Societal standards set are not the measuring scale as to how a child should be raised but rather provide basic insights that should not necessarily be followed if they work against the ideals of parenting.
Strict punishment, induced by parents trying to correct unruly behavior in children has been known to affect children negatively. The punishment can be either inflicted physically or emotionally. Has physical punishment in progressive nature has been identified to create a child abusive environment that restrains a child’s cognitive growth. Physical punishment meted out harshly can cause dire repercussions where a child can be hurt physically, broken bones, or wounds on the skin. Future outcomes include aggressiveness, mental health problems, and antisocial behavior (Ministry of Social Development, 2020). This is despite the strained relationship that the parent and child would have. Abusive languages stemming from parents, meant to directly call out bad behavior, often ends up affecting the children emotionally. Emotional hurt induces self-pity among children, causing them to become withdrawn socially and refrain from most physical activities that they should participate in.
A line should be drawn as to how far physical punishment goes, in as much as most countries proclaim the act banned, it still occurs. Cultures have caused diverse issues arising as in some physical punishment is tolerated and done so within society definitions (Ministry of Social Development, 2020). In some, however, the act is illegal and not allowed to occur to any child. Children growing up in the former tend to take the punishment as just imposed, regarding it a normal happening. However, the children may be unable to detect when the punishment goes overboard. In such instances, the children get adversely affected, becoming aggressive, and believing like physical aggression to push for their ideas. Children in the latter environment, grow up knowing physical punishment as a wrong done unto them. Here, when they are physically punished the children would easily acknowledge the breach in boundaries. It does not, however, assist in pulling them out as some of the children may choose to remain silent about such issues for fear of the parents (Ministry of Social Development, 2020). In both cases, children should be handled with care as parents deliberate on how best to punish them. Ideally, punishments are meant to correct unruly behavior, not add up to unwanted character traits. Which is giving harsh punishments would do to a child.
Punishments should be set within a moral code, that restrains parents from being too aggressive but which ensures satisfactory results from children. Such measures would ensure the child accepts the punishment and ensure that the child’s proper physical growth is maintained. In gauging the manner of punishments that a child receives, there can be no universal discipline measure. People come from different backgrounds such that no single measure can work in every child in sustainably correcting them. It, therefore, comes up to be a parental decision in sustaining a relatively functional, moral, and health-appropriate mode of punishment that aligns with their ideals and that which a child can ultimately benefit from.
Parents tend to have tendencies of withholding necessary information, such as sex education, as they try to raise their kids in proper timing. Some instances, however, demand that parents take proper caution as they withhold information. Most of the procrastinated information that parents refrain from mentioning to children is sex education. Most parents are threatened into thinking that divulging such information would make their children want to be sexually active from a young age. This is a misconception that parents carry, which hoodwinks them into thinking restraining the information is keeping their children safe (Breuner & Mattson, 2016). Sexual education has been found to greatly reduce the causes of early pregnancies, the transmission of sexually transmitted infections, and in helping children make informed decisions about their sexual health. The information should be given at appropriate development stages that suitably match what the child should know. Proper channels should be taken when divulging information such that the child does not feel ambushed or reprimanded when the goal is to make them aware of something.
When parents withhold crucial information about a child from them, it tends to cause resentment feelings and might end up being a cause of poor parent-child relations. The information being withheld should be instead made clear at an appropriate age, during which time a child is old enough to understand. Such information can be that which pertains to the family history or family business or something relevant to the same. Nevertheless, this should not be the reason why parents evade issuing out important knowledge like sex education. Notably, most parents depend on teachers and other professionals to handle such cases, when in fact most children expect to hear from them first (Breuner & Mattson, 2016). Children who cannot acknowledge unhealthy sexual behavior such as rape get affected physically by the action and mentally due to the trauma associated. Being hands-on in regulating a child’s awareness of their body from a young age when they start to tell a part of genders enables them to comprehend the issues that affect them. Physically, a child thrives when he/she can understand their bodies better. It also helps that the emotional state of children who know what to expect from their bodies is stable when certain changes take place (Breuner & Mattson, 2016). Having prior knowledge from parents and supportiveness throughout the time strengthens the bond between a parent and child.
Parents should practice what they tell their children to emulate. Parents who are abusive towards each other, show disconcerted relations to the children. It becomes confusing to a child who is told never to raise their voice when the child can see the same happening with the parents. Children of young ages tend to be conflicted about the right thing to do, especially when they cannot gauge the difference between the two. At times, abusive parents can become physical with the children, which affects them both physically and emotionally. Abusive marriages also create an unstable environment for raising a child as they get caught in the crossfire (Dore & Lee, 1999). Essentially, when a parent does not respect the other, the child gets conflicted on who deserves respect. Most children would be inclined to follow the parent who appeals to them most. Such discontent leads to divided families, and in the instant children witness physical abuse to one parent, they may become traumatized. No child should be raised in such surroundings. It deprives them of physical participation as they isolate themselves from people. The children are also more likely to become abusive themselves in the future or tolerate abusive nature from their partners as they have become preconditioned into believing it is an undeniable occurrence (Dore & Lee, 1999).
There is no use in parents preaching water while drinking wine. Children are known to mimic parental behavior as parents are the first of the child’s role models. A research was conducted to determine food choices in children between the ages of 2 to 6 years and a single parent stationed for each child. Results indicated that the children choose food items that the parents had similarly picked through observations of the survey (Lisa et al. 2008). The children choose food items that they could efficiently relate to what their parents purchased shunning those unfamiliar to them. Likewise, when it comes to mastery of ideals and morals, a child is more likely to follow morals depicted by a parent rather than that which is observed through others. Therefore, if a parent smokes or drinks excessively the child is more likely to follow in the parent’s footsteps as ideally, the actions would seem normal. Parents should thus be careful on the ideals they impact on children unknowingly. In the research, the children chose food items out of familiarity to them not based on the healthy or unhealthy nature of the items. Being too young to notice the difference necessitated by the two. (Lisa et al. 2008). Which relates to how children become conditioned into certain mannerisms. The children would not realize the negative effects of behavior as they have seen it happening and thus consider it right when in reality the behavior is unwanted. Parents should thus strive to impose proper ideals and morals without bridging on the gap of moral uprightness.
Raising a child is forever being the toughest achievement any individual can make. There is no right way or wrong way to raise a child just proper guidance on how to possibly achieve such a feat. Parents should thus be guided by the desire to do well by the child as dictated by the right choices and moral guidelines. They should limit the societal expectations that tend to pressure them into committing to activities that harm a child. At the end of the day, each parent should acknowledge their child as a precious gift and strive to maintain their well-being.