Personhood and Sexual Life
Introduction
The question that I will be working on is ‘How is one’s personhood at stake in sexual life, and particularly in instances of sexual use and sexual violence?’ This will categorically focus on how being a man or a woman exposes you to sexual violence and sexual use in the society as well as how some authors have approached this issue on their various texts. The authors used for this discussion are Susan Bordo, Lynn Philips, and Jackson Katz who all agrees that who has a view that women are prone to sexual violence in the society and that some men hurt women more than the vice versa occurs. In this text, I will support the idea that women are prone to forced sexual use and sexual violence in today’s society.
An example which shows that women are prone to forced sexual use and sexual violence in the today’s society is the rape cases whereby women are the ones who are most affected by cases of rape in the society. Katz, 2006, states that today’s cultures have been experiencing so many sexual violence cases to the point that these cases could be normalized. He states that ‘ours is a culture where sexualized violence, sexual violence, and violence by-sex are so common’ (Katz 149). I agree with Katz idea that society has been experiencing many cases of sexual violence to the point of considering the world is unsafe for us. More so, I also agree with Katz when he states that he states that sexual abuse in society has become a norm. However, it is not because this type of violence and sexuality behavior is preferred or legalized but because it is a fact that we will have to deal with and approach it critically in order to have a long lasting solution. In fact, he openly states that “rape is illegal” (Katz 149), and it has been so even in the jurisdictions that had decriminalized previous crimes such as abortion and same-sex marriages. Therefore, no doubt that rape cases are there in the society and also no doubt that there are efforts that are being done to combat this vice as it threatens the safety of people in the society especially sexuality-related safety.
This problem can be associated with the culture and the methods that are used to bring up the children, especially in the adolescent stage. If the children are not given enough sex education sensitization, the problem of sexual violence against women will always remain a major problem in society. This is because women will not have the acquired strategies to evade such violence while on the other hand, men are not sensitized on the importance of controlling their sexual desires and refraining from committing sexually instigated crimes. Phillips text quotes his interview with some women where he says, “women interviewed felt a strong need for information about sexuality and relationships during adolescence” (Phillips 35). Phillips also adds that “few women expressed the satisfaction with the type of information they received from their sex educators” (Phillips 36). As this text shows, sex education is probably not enough for both men and women, especially at a younger age. Young women are always advised to keep away from boys as it was a case of Diana, one of the interviewee Phillips used in the text who said that her grandmother had told her that ‘men do not come through’ (Phillips 35).
Moreover, women are advised ‘not to give in to men sexual advances’ (Phillips 35-36). This implies that sex education is concerned with the safety of women and as the author shows, men are to a larger extent ignored from sex education hence they are not guided on how to refrain from their sexual desires. This means that although women will be receiving guidelines and instructions on how to deal with the sexual violence, those cases might be increasing since the perpetrators who are mostly men are not given similar education that might help them change their sexual vices. Even in the global news, the cases of sexual violence against women are reported via various media, whereby, many cases have women as victims. More so, many organizations work hard to protect women from violence, such as sexual violence and inappropriate sexual use while very non or very few organizations are involved in men sex education. The idea by Phillips aligns with Katz idea on sexuality and sexual violence whereby the two authors agree that women are at a greater danger to be abused sexually whereby men are the perpetrators. The two authors also agree that there is a need to support the activities that reduce sexual violence against women. Notably, the two authors have not discussed openly the fact that also men are sexually abused and in some cases, women can be rapists. This shows that there is need to consider giving men, especially young men sex education and guidelines the same way girls are educated so as the society can change the sexuality culture and in future, the cases of sexual violence which were referred as normal in the society by Katz (Katz 149) reduce significantly and eventually disappear.
Men are the ones who make sexual advances towards women. This means that men are the ones who seduce women (Bordo 230). Moreover, if they resist, can forcefully use their masculinity to take advantage of these women and have sex with them without their consent (Katz 150). These authors bring out two concepts of sexuality and sexual violence. One, Bordo suggests that it is the men who seduce women and made sexual advances. Bordo states that ‘in all societies known to ethnography it is the male who seduces, propositions, hire prostitutes, and accumulate spouses’ (Bordo 230). This statement can be considered to be true or false. For example, it is true that in society, male are more involved in the sexual activities that Bordo highlighted, such as hiring prostitutes. However, the author does not consider the fact that even the male can act as prostitutes, and in some instances, it is the woman who seduces a man.
Considering that there are gay people who have sex with their fellow men, or lesbians who get intimate with their fellow women, then, it is not true to generalize that it is men who do these things. However, this does not deviate from the idea that women are prone to force sexual use and sexual violence in today’s society. In page 34, Bordo highlights the fact the society could be having a problem to understand what they want from boys. Therefore, there is need to involve boys in sex education if all the sexual violence against women is to be combated successfully. Society has been teaching women to say no through workshops as ‘they still imagine the women as the gatekeepers of the men desires’ (Bordo 245. The same society is teaching men not to take no as an answer. Since women need happiness and love, the sex education ought to change and stop the notions of ‘saying no’ as the outright response to all sexual advances from men. Phillips notes that ‘hetero-relationships are the key to women happiness’ (Phillips 72). To achieve this, men and women must be taught how to relate from a younger age so that the sexual violence cases can be tamed.
Conclusion
In conclusion, this essay has responded to the question ‘How is one’s personhood at stake in sexual life, and particularly in instances of sexual use and sexual violence?’ Moreover, the essay shows why I support the idea that women are prone to forced sexual use and sexual violence in today’s society. The essay used ideas from Bordo, Phillips, and Katz texts which shows that in the current society, women are prone to forced sexual use and sexual violence