Ways Divorce Affect Social Development of Children
The issue of divorce has become critical in the past decade, and research has shown that it tends to affect children’s social development. The different ways divorce affects children’s social development have become an essential part of academic inquiry. Children of divorce tend to remain behind in their social skills, and it is difficult for them to catch up with their peers (Kim 496). The effects of divorce on children may vary from one child to another. Some accept the divorce naturally while others struggle with the transition. The intense marital conflict between divorcing parents affects the social development of the kids, with the issue of child custody being the most influential. Children may have to move schools, which makes them fall behind in making friends. It makes such children feel anxious, sad, lonely, and have low self-esteem than those whose parents are still married. However, the age of the children at the time of parents’ divorce affects how children affected. Therefore, it is advisable that parents have a conversation with their children during the divorce to monitor their development closely. It is crucial to ensure that the children understand that the divorce is not their fault. During a divorce, parents are concerned about the social welfare of their children and want to know whether the decision will make their children happy or if it may affect their health. This paper will investigate how divorce is likely to affect children’s social development as they transition from living with both parents to not seeing both of them at the same time.
Research has shown that children whose parents are divorced are likely to experience health complications, such as increased chances of having asthma and injuries (Social Effects of Divorce). According to the National Survey of Children’s Health, children who live with both parents have a higher social development scale of 50.8 than those whose parents are separated (Social Effects of Divorce). Divorce also affects children emotionally, as they may have low self-esteem, negative feelings, depression, anxiety, and behavioral problems. From this, one can reason that divorce affects children both physically and socially. It clearly explains how children are affected by divorce and how it impacts their development. Such information is crucial for parents who are considering divorce as it may help them decide by considering how the divorce might affect their children. From this, one views divorce as affecting the health of children both psychologically and physically. Generally, children whose parents are divorced will exhibit more antisocial behavior, depression, and anxiety than those from functional families. Children of divorced parents also experience a behavioral problem, which is a psychological issue. Divorce increases the chances of a child engaging in undesirable activities such as increased crime rates, promiscuity, inability to handle conflict, increased chances of committing suicide, and increased risk of using drugs and alcohol.
The other view is that although divorce is harmful to children’s social development, it may be beneficial in some instances. Research has shown that children’s antisocial behavior is likely to reduce after a divorce in a highly dysfunctional family (Mann 113). Children who are regularly exposed to violence and emotional abuse may benefit from their parents’ divorce, enabling them to grow in a more conducive environment. However, parents should come up with a way of ensuring they support their children after a divorce. Although the children may miss living with both parents, there is reduced stress of dealing with adult problems. Parents remaining friendly after the divorce may teach the children that relationships do not have to end ultimately. Also, children deserve good parenting, which might not be available in a family where parents are in constant conflict. Divorce will help the parents focus less on their marital problems and instead learn to value their children and allocate time to reconnect with them. The one on one time spent with parents is valuable and allows parents to focus on their children (Brand 83). Divorce brings out the best in children, especially the older ones who may want to protect their younger siblings. It enables children to better understand life by teaching them how to be tolerant after experiencing hardships.
Another perspective drawn from how divorce affects the social development of children is that it affects the cognitive and non-cognitive development of the children. Research indicates that it is not the divorce that affects children’s cognitive development but the secondary problems associated with it (403 Forbidden). The adjustment that children may have to undertake is likely to reduce their development. The decline in parental support, reduced contact with the parents, economic hardships, conflict, and custody changes are some of the secondary problems that children are likely to experience after parental divorce. Such children are also likely to face stigmatization, which makes them feel unwanted in society. It leads to isolation and loneliness, which may lead to thoughts of suicide. Such experiences can be seen as the children are likely to struggle more in their studies due to the distraction at home. Non-cognitive development is also affected by divorce as children may lose interest in social activities. Children from divorced families have had time relating to others as they tend to feel insecure and do not understand why their family is the only one undergoing a divorce. Divorce also makes it hard for children to adapt to changes. It forces children to learn how to live in a new place, house, school, and have new friends, which may be difficult. They may also lose hope in having a stable family and increasing their chances of divorce after having their own families. Research has shown that children from divorced families are three to four times more likely to divorce in their marriages than those from non-divorced families.
In conclusion, divorce should be discouraged, and parents advised to establish different ways of settling their differences to ensure their children’s social development is not affected. During a divorce, parents, and children are in the process of learning new ways to relate with each other, which may difficult. If divorce cannot be avoided, children should be assisted in the transition and taught to view the changes as an adjustment and not a crisis. This way, their social development will not be affected significantly, and they can have a healthy life. Divorce may also feel awkward in some instances, as children may be forced to take sides. Therefore, parents should avoid putting their children in such a compromising situation to ensure that they have a healthy relationship with both parents after the divorce. Marriage counseling should be advocated for in troubled marriages as it is a more practical method in ensuring the proper development of a child than divorcing.
Works Cited
Brand, Jennie. “Parental Divorce Is Not Uniformly Disruptive to Children’s Educational Attainment.” PNAS, 9 Apr. 2019, www.pnas.org/content/116/15/7266.
Kim, Hyun Sik. “Consequences of parental divorce for child development.” American sociological review 76.3 (2011): 487-511. 10.1177/0003122411407748.
Mann, Denise. “Divorce Affects Kids’ Academic, Social Skills.” WebMD, WebMD, 2 June 2011, www.webmd.com/parenting/news/20110602/divorce-affects-kids-academicsocial-skills.
“Family Instability and Children’s Social Development.” Child Trends, 7 Aug. 2019, www.childtrends.org/publications/family-instability-and-childrens-social-development.
“Social Effects of Divorce.” Unhappy Marriage, 6 Dec. 2018, unhappymarriage.info/social-effects-divorce.
“403 Forbidden.” Psychology Today, Carl E Pickhardt Ph.D., 19 Dec. 2011, www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/surviving-your-childsadolescence/201112/the-impact-divorce-young-children-and-adolescents.